Dear Mr McBride continues... Communication 4

To: Mr T E McBride CEO 

From: Capt. A Hall 
April 16 2002 

Dear Mr McBride.

I was greatly honoured to learn that you had made a personal visit to my office and I apologise that my re-arranged schedule prevented me from being present at the intended meeting. I must emphasise, however, that the plants in the corner of my office pointed out to you by Miss Tomlinson are most certainly not Cannabis. I purchased the seeds during our night stop in Tangiers and the tests that are currently in progress at the police laboratory will doubtless confirm that it is a harmless species of decorative plant, exactly as the gentleman in the market assured me.

Your own extensive travels throughout the African Continent will have made you well aware of the high regard in which beasts of burden are held in those countries. In retrospect, it is unfortunate that some members of our crew saw fit to bring a camel back to the hotel. My own opinion was that the animal should have been tied up outside and not brought into the foyer. The receptionist’s primary objection to the situation referred to our attempts to persuade the camel to enter the elevator. We felt it unkind to try to make it climb the stairs. When the manager was summoned, both he and I agreed that it is truly incredible how one animal is able to produce such a large amount of effluent. The crew settled the additional payment for the cleaning and no further charge should have been added to our account. I suggest that the excess charges are strongly refuted by Accounts.

The regrettable confusion during the departure preparations from Tangiers was mainly due to language difficulties. The catering contractors obviously were unable to translate the list of preferred meals, resulting in the provision of an exclusively local menu. In my own opinion, kebabs are a perfectly acceptable substitute for Chicken Maryland. I strongly, but with respect, resent the suggestion that I somehow profited by dealing direct with a local restaurant in preference to our approved caterers. I can also categorically assure you that no member of the crew referred to any passenger as a bleating old bat.

Due to a shortage of correct engineering capability, it was not possible to have repairs carried out to the in-flight entertainment system during the night stop. We managed to provide musical entertainment on the return flight by connecting the First Officer’s portable CD player to the cabin PA system. I can readily appreciate that Iron Maiden and Deep Purple are not to everyone’s taste, but I am sure that the majority of the passengers appreciated our efforts. As you are aware, the volume level on the PA system is set at a level to ensure audibility under most flight conditions and it is a pity that several passengers found the music excessively loud.

Although I readily agree that the responsibility for the conduct of any flight rests with the aircraft commander, I felt it appropriate to allow the First Officer to fly the aircraft back to base without interference from me. As his usual home base is Gatwick, he is not totally familiar with the layout of Stansted and it is not therefore surprising that it took him several hours to locate the Terminal after landing or to realise that we had actually landed at Luton. I understand that Easyjet were extremely helpful in arranging coach transport for our passengers. I have had a discussion with him and have pointed out the advisability of admitting any uncertainty at an early stage. Any accusation that I was asleep is totally unfounded.

Your requirement for an early meeting is noted and I will endeavour to make myself available.

Kindest regards

Allen Hall.