This is me!

                                                The Tale of Jed Thresher Under protest, and not without a great deal of grumbling, I was attempting to deal with a plague of snails in my garden when the phone rang. Gardening was, at that period in my life, a function that I carried out strictly in self-defence and I was far from dismayed when my wife indicated that the caller wished to speak to me.   Without preamble, the voice at the other end demanded to know if I was Allen, the keyboards player. With some slight hesitation I admitted that the information was accurate. Over several years of deputising with various bands, I had learned to exercise caution in making such admissions, as many semi-professional musicians are reluctant to discuss their earnings with HM Inspectors of Taxes and those Inspectors tend to use similar discretion in disclosing their identity.   For reasons that were not immediately apparent, the name given to me by the caller seemed vaguely familiar. He claime